DC Scotch whisky Club is Online

DC Scotch Club is officially online. Feel free to celebrate with a glass of Scotch.

That's right, I finally sat down and launched this site. I know what you're thinking, "Hunter, Hunter, wasn't it supposed to be called 'Big-Titty McAverageFace' in honor of the infamous body-shot-prone bartender who works at 18th and Red?" Well, yes, but I thought I would limit her presence on the site to a shout out or two and keep the title a little more classy. I mean, we're trying to maintain some semblance of decorum here, right? Right?

Moving on. As this is the debut post, and I believe we have cycled through the entire roster of members as hosts (Hege being the first host last October), I thought I'd reach back into the archives (of my email) and revisit the formative days of our fine Club. Here are the minutes from that first meeting, October 4, 2007 at Hege's place on Columbia, so dutifully recorded by Marc "Skinny White Kid" Aaron. Take a moment to peruse, I hope you'll find this stroll down memory lane as amusing and delightfully asinine as I did:

The Gentlemen's Scotch whisky Club, Inaugural Meeting, 10/4/07

Ardberg Single Islay Malt Scotch Whisky – 10 years

Hege: fire in the belly; satisfying. I really like the way the bottle opens and closes.
PJDJ: I can't get past the smoky taste at the end. It's all I can focus on. Reminds me of Harley-Davidsons. It's kinda like getting your salmon blackened. Some people like the burning, the char. This sounds like a rottweiler when you open it.
Chris: It burns a lot.
Marc: It burns a lot like syphilis?
DP: Subtle taste that goes down easy.
Marc: I agree with none of what you just said.
Hunter: I think it smells like bacon, and not because we were just talking about it. Well, maybe. Better than Tamdhu. Taste right up front, washes down. Memorable.

Glenfiddich – 10 Years

PJDJ: almost no after-taste in that there's no after-taste. Less tingly smell. Reminds me more of flower fields. The bottle sounds like a prepubescent girl when you open it.
Hege: It lacks in the aftertaste, but is a bit sweet. Full-body. I really do like it.
Marc: It's my base.
DP: goes down way smoother. I like the char aftertaste but I understand why you said that the first one didn't go down easy.
Hunter: More similar to the Tamdhu. A little more bitter and tastes more like alcohol. Looking for a chaser. "Standard tasting."

Tamdhu – 10 Years

DP: The worst of both worlds. Went down harsh and no smoky aftertaste.
PJDJ: I agree. Why bother?
Hunter: Smooth as a starter [first try] but uneventful. Didn't really grab me.

(Editor's Note: Not sure why there is missing commentary here, Skinny White Kid was in the bathroom pulling his pood or something.)

RULES:

1. If anyone were to be added to the club, you need to have unanimous approval of the people present. To hold a meeting you must have a minimum of 4 people. Members only at people's places, a new member (or out of town guest) can be brought to outings.

2. We have to have a meeting within the first 7 days of each calendar month. Rotation of meeting place can go by alphabetical order by first name. When two members live in the same place, one person's turn must be an outing.

3. Once a quarter, a field trip must be undertaken. The venue will be rotated among members; the person who is the host will be able to choose the activity, alternate venue, etc.

4. What is said in Scotch Club, stays in Scotch Club.

5. Professionalism must be kept when recording observations on Scotch, but the rest is off-limits.

6. New members must capture the flag of responsibility.

7. Host picks bottle choices with number of bottles based on expected attendance. If members commit to be there, they must pay dues. A bottle of scotch (even if it's a repeat) must be purchased; if the host is in a jam, they must make every attempt to call other members for a helping hand.

8. When a person is leaving a meeting, that person says their own toast and then each member present responds in turn with said toast.

9. You must attend one meeting or the outing per quarter. Three consecutive misses raises the question to the individual if they are still committed to the group.

10. Minutes must be circulated within 7 days of the meeting.

11. A meeting begins with the host swigging one kind of scotch from the bottle and passing it around the group. Late-comers must do this as well.

12. If you're going to have an informal event and you don't invite every member, you will receive one hit per member with a tube sock full of nickels.

DRESS CODE: business casual. Nice jeans only. No sneakers. Collared shirt a must.

Chris: Treasurer
Hege: Keeper of the Wardrobe
Marc: Scribe
Joe: Minister of Entertainment
PJDJ: Brand Manager
DP: Literary Chair

Other members (not present) include: BOC, J-Huang, Clay, Rob, Dan Isaacs, Cohen, DP's roommate Dave [proposed new member], Mo [proposed new member]

Important Notes Given at Random Points:

-Baltimore strip clubs are a good idea. Field trip and permission slips all 'round.

-PJDJ has created an amazing coat of arms and motto. Hopes for a t-shirt abound.

-JG: Crystal City Sports Pub is one of the best sports bars I've ever been to, outside of a Vegas sportsbook.

-Field trip to Scotland is officially on the 10 year plan.

-Artfully argued: taters can refer to boobs because tater tots look like nipples. (JG).

-Farting is definitely always funny. (JG)

Comment of the Meeting:

Friends of Hege's ran into Sean Connery at some scotch whisky event in New York and tried to ask him to share some conquest stories. He refused and said that "A gentleman never tells." When people were leaving the place, Sean came over to Hege's friends and said, "1962. Marilyn Monroe. In the arse."